Ever been here?  It’s 4:00 p.m. and I’ve dashed into the grocery store with four tired, hungry kids in tow because I used my last dipaer about 4 hours ago and I know I can’t get away with putting it off much longer.  Nobody much wants to be there, and everyone is expressing this in his or her unique way. Thomas finds teasing his sisters mercilessly passes the time. Katy is responding with loud and venomous attacks, occasionally containing the word friggin’ (so far, her worst). Faith is so tired she is, in her own words, “practically dead”, and every few steps pauses to lay down on the floor, far too fatigued to take into account current shopping cart traffic patterns.  The baby is insulted at having been put into the kiddy seat when everybody else is walking.  Since this position puts her roughly at bosom-height, she figures the least I can do is nurse her, so she helpfully yanks up my shirt every two seconds, yelling “Nursies!” at a volume truly astonishing given her compact size.  I’m doing the best I can just to get in, get the diapers, and get out without security intervening. But I’m not too frazzled to notice the looks from the other shoppers.  I  know what they’re thinking, whether or not they say a word (and believe me, some do!) The kind ones are thinking, “Been there, done that.”  The rest are casting silent aspursions on my parenting skills. [Read more...]

I hear voices in my head.  A lot of them.  My parents, friends, parenting “experts”, former colleaugues, acquaintances from church, other parents…you name it, they’re talking to me.  And they have an annoying habit of speaking up whether their opinions are welcome or not.  Lately, I’ve gotten pretty fed up with it.  So I’ve decided to start talking back.  Here are some of the conversations I’ve had… [Read more...]

Join me on a journey of the imagination…..

We’re living sometime in the distant future, and intergalactic travel has become possible. A new world, light years away, has been discovered to have intelligent life.  What’s more, the beings there have invited you to come for a sort of exchange program.  You’ll be assigned a host family to live with while you explore this foreign world.  You eagerly make the trip and arrive in a place that is totally, utterly new.  Nothing works the way you expect; the laws of physics don’t apply here.   Your own body has undergone drastic changes in order to survive here, and has become unpredictable.  The language is incomprehensible. You have no idea how to meet your own physical needs, how to navigate the outside world, or how to communicate your needs and questions to the native population. [Read more...]