When I was brand new to unschooling, I really wanted examples. I had researched the philosophy, but wanted to know what it looked like in action. I wished I could follow an unschooling family around for a week or so, and just watch.
I thought it might be helpful to newcomers to read about a few of our days. Bear in mind that there is no “formula” for how to unschool. It will look different from day to day and from family to family. Below are some of our recent days. Come follow us around!
DAY ONE
I woke up at 5:00 a.m. (don’t be impressed; this hardly ever happens), had some quiet time, ate breakfast and threw in a load of laundry (laundry figures big into our days; with 6 of us there’s always a pile of it!)
At 6:00 Maggie, the 2 year old, woke up and wandered down to find me. We rested on the couch while she nursed.
Thomas was the next one up at 7:00. We watched Arthur together, and then about half of a nature show about gorillas. Thomas just finished reading a Magic Tree House book on mountain gorillas and has gotten interested in them. He had some cereal and juice while we watched, and Maggie indulged in a frozen blueberry smoothie.
By 8:00, Thomas and Maggie had made their way into our “classroom” (so named back in the days when we attempted a more “school-at-home” model). Maggie colored while Thomas worked on writing a script for a play (he’s quite a theater guy). He snacked on a soy pop while he wrote.
Faith got up at 8:15 and wanted to dive right into the summer reading program offered by the town library. We read three books and recorded them on the library chart. One of the books led to a discussion about war and its alternatives.
At 9:00 Katy, my night-owl, finally meandered downstairs. All three older kids worked on Thomas’s scripts while Maggie watched Baby Einstein and I tidied a bit.
At 9:30, Katy and Thomas had some pancakes. Shortly thereafter an issue about personal property arose, and we took some time to iron that out.
By 10:00, the problem was resolved. Katy and Thomas went upstairs to play together while Faith ate some cereal. Then all four kids played dollhouse in Thomas’s room.
Now, lest you get the idea that all unschoolers have nothing but blissful interactions 24/7, let me tell you that after about 15 minutes fighting ensued, Thomas decided he wanted to play with Katy only, and Maggie and Faith were unceremoniously kicked out. Faith decided she wanted to play with a friend, and practiced her phone skills to invite over a neighbor.
From 11:00 – 12:00 Faith and her friend drew pictures, then changed into bathing suits and went out to splash in the kiddie pool. Meanwhile, Katy and Thomas contined work on the scripts. Over the course of the hour, Maggie nursed on and off, drew pictures, sang songs with me, and had a discussion about family relationships (“Who’s your mommy? Who’s Nana’s mommy? Who’s Daddy’s mommy?”….you get the idea).
At noon, Maggie played with pattern blocks while I made lunch: everyone wanted peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, fruit smoothies and yogurt covered pretzels. Faith and her friend had a picnic outside. Maggie, Thomas and Katy had an indoor picnic, watching Ni Hau Kai-Lan while they ate in the living room.
From 1:00 1:30 the four older kids played together outside. Then Faith and Annie played Polly Pockets upstairs, and Katy and Thomas stayed outside playing water games and trying to discover the source of a stream of water flowing down our street.
Around 2:00, Faith, Maggie, and Annie fingerpainted. The activity was lively, but short-lived. We started cleaning up about twenty past.
At this point, I had to leave for an appointment. Faith walked her friend home and called to say she’d been invited to stay. My mother arrived just as the Goldbergs called to invite us over for a swim. They are an elderly couple who live across the street. My kids have developed a wonderful relationship with them, and are sort of “surrogate grandchildren”. The Goldbergs often ask us over to take a dip, while they enjoy the entertainment that only four kids in a pool can provide.
While I was gone, Faith came home and my mother took all 4 kids over to the Goldbergs. Maggie splashed around for a while, then napped on Nana’s lap while the others swam. They arrived back a bit before 5:00 and had a snack before heading back outside to play.
The kids played outside until about 6:30, when Faith came in to play on the computer. Meanwhile, I had arrived home, continued the laundry, and tidied up some more. Ted came home from work at 5:30 and joined the kids outside. Maggie played on her own and nursed occasionally.
At 7:00, the kids were served Bunny Platters (hard-boiled eggs cut and shaped into flowers, with toast for the stem and a mixture of carrots, raisins and honey on the side). They were tired, and enjoyed watching Backyardigans while they munched.
At 8:00, everybody got on their p.j.’s and helped tidy their rooms. I vacuumed Thomas’s room, which inspired Katy to vacuum hers. This led to a game they dubbed “maids”; Thomas and Katy would clean up a section of a room, while Faith paid them with money from our classroom kitty.
About 8:30, Ted took Maggie into the playroom where they build with blocks while I read our nightly Bible story to the older ones.
By 9:00, Thomas and Katy were building the Great Wall of China out of dixie cups they’d saved. It was quite impressive! Faith decided to hang out with Maggie. They sorted large buttons by shape. Faith taught Maggie the word “hexagon”. Next, they played with magnetic letters. This gave Ted and me about an hour to work on a project together.
At 10:00, Faith asked Ted to put her to bed, and Thomas decides to turn in as well. Maggie, Katy and I headed upstairs about 10:20. Maggie nursed herself to sleep while Katy snuggled beside me and recapped her day. By 10:30, everyone was asleep, resting up for another busy day in our unschooled lives!
Stay tuned for some more days!
This is very useful information, as is the opportunity to come and witness your family unschool. My children are 4 months and 3 years, so it is on my mind to begin thinking of our days in an unschooling way. If coming to to visit your family, where do you live? I’m also curious what choices you’ve made about Bible stories to read for kids–if there are particular ones you like. Thank you for your posts! I am rather alone in the unschooling world, at the moment, but know that in time a community will build for me.
Hi Julie,
Thanks for your comment! It’s wonderful that you are already shifting your thinking, before your children come of “school” age!
My family is located in Massachusetts. We’d love to have you come visit if you can!
I love your optimism about building an unschooling community. The more you connect, the greater the possibilities. The Facebook page Unschoolers Seek, moderated by Joe Martin, is a wonderful resource for finding other unschoolers in your area.
As far as Bible stories go, we’ve got a bunch that we draw from, but here are our favorites: The Jesus Storybook Bible by Sally Lloyd-Jones, The Little Boys (or Little Girls) Bible Storybook for Mothers and Sons (or Daughters) by Carolyn Larsen, and Read Aloud Bible Stories by Ella K. Lindvall.
Best wishes to you and your family! Enjoy the journey!
-Nicole
Thank you for writing and posting this. This is our first year to “unschool”. I’ve been banging my head against the wall “homeschooling” my 8yr old, 7 yr old, and 5 yr old (whilst chasing the 4 yr old and the one year old) the previous three years (adjust ages, as necessary, ofcourse). Since the last day of school last year ended with me threatening to put my oldest in the public school system, I KNEW this was not working!!
Thus we decided to “unschool”. We have had a much more relaxing and enjoyable year. I fight worry… worry that I’m not “doing enough”. That they won’t read. My eight yr old son still isn’t reading past K/1st greade level. He’s been so beaten up as we tried to learn to read, that he insists he “hates reading”. 🙁 So I’m going slow.
They spend their days playing, mostly. Right now the craze is Blockland on the computers. Is that OK???!! And the x-box. Sometimes they watch TV. We read togethere as a family. Do crafts. Play outside and help in the kitchen. Everything we’re “taught’ says that’s a waste of time. But maybe, just maybe, they are learning…
Thanks for the post. Very encouraging. Have a great day! And a wonderful new year!!
Thanks for your comment, Jessica; I’m glad you enjoyed the post. Kudos to you for listening to your inner wisdom, which was telling you that something wasn’t right. It’s all too easy to ignore this voice, but amazing things become possible when we heed it.
You’re still fairly new to unschooling, and your little ones are very likely undergoing a process called “deschooling”, which is quite typical when children have had formal schooling (whether at a school or at home). During the deschooling phase, it’s really normal for you, the parent, to feel some anxiety (after all, you’re “deschooling” too!). Try to breathe your way through it, noting your own worries and fears, and then releasing them – at least for the moment.
Eventually, it becomes easy to see the amazing depth of learning going on in EVERY activity, whether it’s a computer game, a tv show, or helping to make lunch. So yes, what your children are doing right now IS “okay”…in fact, it’s exactly what their inner wisdom is telling them they need in the present. And they ARE learning, despite what mainstream thinking has to say about it 🙂
Joyce Fetteroll has some really helpful posts about deschooling on her site, joyfullyrejoycing.com if you’re curious, and their are some other posts on my site that actually list out the “academics” in certain activities such as cooking, that you may want to peek at as well.
I wish you all the best on your unschooling journey!
Take good care,
Nicole
Thank you for this. I have been looking and looking for someone to “show” me what their unschooling days look like but it’s so hard to find much. I have 4 kids close together in age like you (ages 5 down to 7 mos) and I have decided that we are going to start unschooling this summer. I also have a degree in Early Childhood and Special Education, so it has taken some time to wrap my head around the idea of homeschooling–and then as I browsed curriculum options, I realized that I’m already unschooling! That’s just what you do with young kids! And I realized how much I LOVE being with my kids when I am thinking this way. So, we’re going to go for it!
Reading this description of your day, I can honestly say I think I’m on the right track. Thank you for helping to solidify that for me. Our situations aren’t going to be exact of course, but it will be similar. I am a little worried about those days that I’ll doubt and worry that they aren’t learning “enough” every day–but I know that deep down I know they are learning. Children are resilient and curious and really, it is our society that holds back their creativity. I intend to help my children find their creativity and inner passions in a way that the school district can never do for them. That’s my job as a mother.
One question I have for you: How many extracurricular programs are your kids a part of? We try to live a simple and minimalistic life, but I have strong feelings about going out and about, learning things from others who have skills mom doesn’t have, and serving other people. Wondered if you had any tips on ways to make sure that is happening in their daily lives.
Thanks again!
Hi Katrina! Thanks for sharing! You’re exactly right; we all basically “unschool” our young kids. But somewhere along the way, we stop trusting the process, and begin to worry that without formal instruction, our children will just stop learning. Nothing could be further from the truth! You likely will have moments of doubt and worry (we all do!), so just embrace those moments when they come and use them as opportunities to remind yourself of the wonderful things already happening in your children’s lives.
I love your words…”Children are resilient and curious…I intend to help my children find their creativity and inner passions in a way that the school district can never do for them.” Beautiful! Hold on to those words when you’re having doubts 🙂
As far as extracurricular activities, for us it varies from season to season and child to child. There are times we avail ourselves of community programs such as sports or drama. Other times we set up internships independently (this year two of my children volunteered at a preschool and learned absolutely wonderful things by observing and assisting the teachers). We also connected with a local homeschooling group that offers all kinds of opportunities, from formal classes to field trips to park days, to service projects. Although the entire range of homeschooling is represented (not just unschoolers), plenty of the offerings completely fit with our family’s values and philosophy. Finally, we engage in service projects through our church and in our neighborhood. Connecting with some unschooling groups on yahoo or facebook can also give you ideas of things other people do. I think you’ll find that many opportunities will come your way if you’re keeping an eye out for them.
I wish you much joy as you continue your journey – it’s an amazing way to live! 🙂